Tag Archives: writeups

How The Half of It defies Its Genre CONVENTIONS

Ellie Chu tells the audience right up in the opening sequence of the film – “This is not a love story”, à la the narrator in ‘500 Days of Summer’. And just like ‘500 Days of Summer’, ‘The Half of it’ subverts all genre conventions and tropes that people have come to expect, while still being a part of it and playing by its rules. It takes the very familiar story (one that’s been told over and over again, especially in the recent string of teen movies from Netflix), and just decides give the story realistic conclusions. And in doing so, it becomes something more than the genre sets it out to be, and the movies breaks free to greatness just like it’s protagonist.

The Half of It Official Trailer from Netflix.

I’m gonna be honest here, I’m not a fan of these Teen/High School movies from Netflix; most times they are just too cliched and suck real bad. And while ‘The Half of It’ has a really cliched plot, the executions and certain choices made in the production help it rise above it’s peers. The story begins with our lead protagonist Ellie Chu, an immigrant from China living alone with her father since her mom’s demise, as she explains us the concept soulmates to us using Greek mythology. “According to Greek mythologyhumans were originally created with four arms, four legs and a head with two faces. Fearing their power, Zeus split them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives in search of their other halves.” she says, showing her search for that fairy tale concept of love. But Ellie isn’t bothered much about that, she spends her time learning and writing papers for other students in exchange of money, so she can go to college even if it’s not her dream school. To spice up her boring life, one day High school jock Paul approaches her to write letters popular high school beauty Aster, so that he can woo. You have seen any movie in this genre over the last few decades, you know what’s gonna happen next. Naturally Ellie falls for Aster as they exchange letters and feels like she has finally found her other half who understands hers.

The friendship between Ellie and Paul is without a doubt the best aspect of The Half of It.

But here the film decides to take things a little different and turns itself into a complex and nuanced tale. First of all, yes it’s a story of a lesbian Chinese immigrant and that is a huge thing in itself. But just having a progressive character in your film doesn’t make it groundbreaking or good for that matter, it’s what you do with those characters that matters. This story could easily turn into the ‘gay best-friend’ trope popular in so many rom-coms, but instead what develops is really nuanced and probably one of movie friendships in recent memory. The chemistry between Leah Lewis and Daniel Diemer is off the charts and the cute moments they share together were the highlights in film for me. And while Ellie is falling hard for Aster, Paul starts developing feelings for Ellie being unaware of the situation. Now this is the part of the story that could really go wrong by becoming very awkward or cheesy. But not The Half of it, rather it gives the decisions of it’s character real world repercussions which help them grow. Like Ellie Ellie says in another of her voice-overs, “no one will get what they want in the ensuing story. But they will get what they need.

The Half Of It – Leah Lewis, Daniel Diemer, Collin Chou – Photo Credit: Netflix / KC Bailey Movie Review

That is not say that The Half of it does a perfect job of rising above it’s genre, it gives up to it in certain places, like in a “standing up and shouting out their feelings” scene in the third act. And while it doesn’t resolve in the conventional way, it still uses those devices to tell the story. It definitely breaks out and stand above others in the genre, but still it ain’t no 500 days of Summer. But hey, saying that it is not as good as one of the best movies of this century is not really a criticism. And considering how many rules this movies breaks, from story telling plot devices to real life issues like teenage sexuality, Asian culture and even a subtle dab at religion. But again, I have seen a lot of articles praise the movie just for being progressive and said how it criticized religious people, but reading was quite different, I didn’t feel like it was undermining religious people at all, if anything it made understand why they believe what they believe in. And that’s the thing, this movie takes each of its characters seriously and gives them layer – saying that this movie is trying to show down upon any community only undermines the things it tries to speak for.

Ellie kissing goodbye to Aster in The Half of It.

Alice Wu does an excellent job in directing the movies, she adds just enough quirk and innovative techniques to make it all seem special. This is only her sophomore film and her last film was fifteen years back. I don’t know if it’s for any personal reason, but if it is because she wasn’t getting any work, that’d be a huge bummer because boy does she direct this film. Leah Lewis nails the lead role and surely expecting to see more for from her. The overall cast is really good too, not much bad stuff to say here. And yeah, the score – it is just beautiful and a lot more emotion to the story. I’m definitely gonna listen to that score over and over.

 “Love is messy, and horrible, and selfish, and … bold.”

So overall The Half of It is one of the rare teenage dramas on Netflix that’s funny and heart touching forever. Scenes like when Ellie’s dad speak about his wife’s demise for the first time or when Paul runs after Ellie on the train are gonna stay with you for a long time. And just like Tom in 500 days of Summer, when Ellie learns what love really means and we reach the heartbreak point in the story, you feel like you grow up with her. And then when she leaves her home for a successful career, you feel that change in you as you see Paul and Ellie struggle saying goodbye to each other. So, while it isn’t a love story, it is definitely one of the sweetest friendship, and that should be enough reason for you to give it a watch,

Paul running after Ellie’s train in the Half of it.

The Half of it is now streaming on Netflix. Big recommendation.

Music Interviews: “Heart & Hand Grenades” Talk about being a hard rock band based in buffalo.

  1. Would you guys please introduce yourselves and explain your role in the band?

We are Hearts & Hand Grenades, a Buffalo born hard rock band. We’ve got Stephanie Wlosinski on bass and lead vocals, Mike Bress on rhythm guitar and keys, Kenny Blesy on lead guitar, and Tom Lafferty on drums.

2. Where did you guys meet and how did you form this band?

We all met through the cover music scene here in Buffalo. Stef and I started playing in bands together about eight years ago in a local rock band. Somewhere along the way we met Tom and Kenny in the scene, we became friends, and even started jamming together at some gigs. It wasn’t until Stef and I performed at a local telethon in early 2019 that we decided it was time to get our own original project going. This was due Robby Takac from the Goo Goo Dolls who approached us afterward and insisted we get in his Studio GCR and get the music laid down. We then approached Kenny and Tom to get them on board and here we are.

  1. What kind of music do you make or would like to make in the future?

We are all about the hard rock. When we recorded our first EP ‘Wait’ we knew we wanted to make great hard rock songs. We ended up doing just that. We soon got to work on our second EP ‘Nothing Left’ and felt even stronger with the music as we moved toward our goal of being classified as a hard rock band. With our third EP release ‘Adrenaline’, I think we’ve arrived at our goal. The latest EP is full of some powerhouse rock music.

  1. What do you enjoy the most about the process of making music together?

The creativity of building a song from scratch is the most fun for us. I like sitting down with a blank piece of paper and watching a song being born. From that first moment when you have that sweet guitar riff in your head, and you are able to build that into a complete idea is just great. It is very satisfying to see everyone put their thoughts and ideas into making the songs what they are in the end.

  1. What are some of your favourite themes to explore through your music?

There are a lot that we’ve portrayed in the songs we released already. I’d have to say the dominant themes reside around hopelessness, anger, and frustration. Everyone in their lives has a story surrounding these at any given time. It is natural to take an idea in this area and run with it. Some are fiction and some are not.

  1. Who are some artists that you love or who you’d say has had a huge influence on your work?

I’d say going back to the early eighties with Judas Priest, Metallica, and AC/DC is where we draw a lot of influence from. Those guitar riffs and the overall feel of the songs were just ground-breaking. They have stood the test of time and you can hear their style and play of music in a ton of hard rock bands out there today.

  1. Where can someone looking for your music, find it?

Our music is available for streaming everywhere. You can find us on platforms like Spotify, Pandora, YouTube, Deezer, Jango, etc. It is also available for purchase from iTunes, Amazon Music, Google Play, etc.

  1. What’s your favourite part about touring/ doing live performances?

Our absolute favorite thing about playing live is the rush. There is nothing better than standing up on that stage with loads of screaming fans standing before you. It is amazing to see them getting into music that you have created. I still remember the first time I saw a fan singing the lyrics to our music back and that really gave me a chill. I knew we were destined for some amazing things at that moment.

  1. What kind of message would you like to give your fans, through your music?

Through our music, I guess I wouldn’t have a specific topic that I would keep pushing. We write our songs on the edge of our seats. The ideas come to us, and we lay them down. At one moment we might talk about finding out your deepest secret or needing a fix. It’s really just whatever idea we had at the moment we were writing the song.

  1. Where do you guys see yourselves in the future, or what are your future plans for the band?

We see ourselves on the big stages in the next couple of years. We are actively looking at putting a tour together so we can hit the road and get our music out of the Buffalo area live for everyone to be a part of. We got into this for the long haul and look forward to every little moment along the way.

Orpheus in the Underworld

Late night at the fortress, high, 
Higher than a kite in the sky,
Surrounded by people smelling of piss and sweat 
Dirty walls holding tears of it's thousand inmates.

Segregated and kept separated
Beaten and tortured until broken
Locked in these cells like animals, who don't cooperate,
Spend forever here on charges of crimes against the state.

Blades run for those who disobey,
Killing all that comes on it's way,
Chains bind them to their doom,
Going mad together in this tomb.

My mind's intoxicated, all my senses blurred
Thoughts pummel my head, bordering on the absurd
I need to get to Raven,I need to fortify her
But the visions in front me form a constant blur.

Inside the cages filled with golden canaries,
These walls hide their most priced possession,
A hundred year old bard,
With long flowing hairs and beard
Whiter than Gandalf, from the darkness appeared
Growling in a voice, strong enough to persuade even the purest
To melt even the strongest
And to cure even the sickest.
Blinded by the light, I bow down on one knee
And listen to Orpheus go on a recitation spree.







Why I avoid all Instagram controversies?

It’s like almost every other week that there is a new controversy out there on Instagram or Twitter, where some account seemingly exposes people doing shady stuff, and a million people jump onto their share train, depending on whether it suits their agenda. Now, I would like to clarify right away, and I don’t justify any of the misbehavior that these accounts are trying to bring to people’s notice and neither am I trying to shame people who share posts related to their agenda. I get it, it’s only natural. But I can’t help but notice, how faulty these accusations are sometimes when there is no way to prove them, and why is it only coming from accounts of social media influencers who need followers and new trends. Again, I’m not accusing anybody, I’m just asking – what basis do you have to give out your opinions on these issues?

Legal action taken against the boys part of the Instagram group “boislockerroom”,

Most recently, two days back a post went viral across all social media platforms where a girl shared a screenshot of an Instagram group Boys Locker Room where the boys posted very objectionable content and threatened to rape a girl. Now obviously, this became a huge thing and lots of people shared it with their followers and the social media influencers got content for another week. While this definitely is a big issue and the boys in that group should definitely be taught a lesson, is this really the way to go about it? Whenever ‘leaks’ like this happen, there is an obligatory comment at the end of the post that the person is not sharing this for publicity, but she feels like people should know about this. But is it though? I mean if you tell the police or contact the journalist, your story will naturally be heard eventually. That’s why whenever there is a new controversy on the internet I just ignore it, because chances are that it just ain’t true.

Soon men came out opposing the incident with #girlslockerroom and #notallmen, which in my opinion only increased the problem in a way which could have different only if the situation was handled differently.
Manav Singh killed himself after being publicly shamed on Instagram for alleged rape.

So, am I saying that you should ignore everything that happens to let the people who do such horrendous stuff go away easily? No, absolutely not. I’m just asking you to wait for an official police statement and the court’s decision before you share your opinion. Shame people all you want but only when you’ve seen the whole picture. How many more people do we have to lose before we realize that the judge and jury of the public is not what the world needs?

Never Have I Ever – Mindy Kaling’s Netflix Dramedy is the perfect depiction of the Struggles of Growing up Desi.

Never Have I Ever, Show Runner – Mindy Kaling

A Netflix teen drama starring an Indian lead? Well, that’s new and that’s exactly what attracted me towards the show the most. The show follows the life of Devi, a first generation Indian-American sophomore living in Southern California, who’s trying to re-brand herself and get popular at school. Right away, it was nice to see an Indian character not being portrayed as the nerdy stereotype in an American Sit-com. This story is very personal to Mindy Kaling, and it’s apparent from the care it is given to make these characters feel authentic – these are her experiences of growing up Desi in America, updated to a 2020 setting. Now, I’m not ABCD (American Born Confused Desi) girl, but these experiences are quite universal if you’ve grownup in a South-Asian household. Especially now, since our current is so much exposed to the western media through the internet, streaming apps, e.t.c. So, even if you’re living in a strict house under the super-spy vigilance of your parents, you’re not entirely living in a bubble. Teenagers today and opinionated, liberal, demand respect and frankly quite out there (and yeah, they’re still horny af). So, the divide between the generations is bigger than ever.

Devi is, needless to say, a virgin, and also an intelligent firebrand with a seemingly effortless command of power-points, witty barbs and topical-enough pop culture references (“Yeah, but he has a hot face. You’ll be like Zayn and Gigi,” she tells her friend as a boyfriend sales pitch). She’s also a master deflector, reeling, with a John McEnroe-style short fuse, from a massive loss. (McEnroe, for no reason seemingly beyond the fact they could get him, narrates the series.) “As you know,” she half-prays, “last year sucked for a number of reasons.” As abruptly revealed in what seems like a first-episode bit but is not, her beloved father – a sunny, unbridled presence in sepia flashbacks and dream sequences, and Devi’s only true best friend – died of a heart attack at her orchestra concert the year prior. The shock paralyzed her for three months (teenagers: not forgiving of the concept “psychosomatic”), forcing her to use a wheelchair. Only the sight of her crush, swim-team boy and said stone-cold hottie Paxton Hall-Yoshida (Darren Barnet) – a layered mystery or stock jock character, depending on the scene – and the promise of a “rebrand” in sophomore year, zaps Devi back on her feet.

It’s so refreshing to see someone like Devi to be given plot like since most Teen Dramas limit the role of the Indian kid as the “dork”. Devi is given layers, she is not an ideal protagonist either, throughout the show she makes plenty of mistakes but that only make her more interesting as a character. But the biggest problem she has to face in the series is probably carrying the Indian baggage. Her ideal constantly clash with her mother, which is the primary conflict in the series. Her mother is very conservative and traditionally Indian, and panic at even the mention of a boyfriend. She doesn’t believe in therapy, American school system, privacy, having fun, talking back to elders or basically anything that is considered “useless” or “wrong” in India. Don’t get me wrong, she is no way a villain in the story, she does all of because she wants to protect her but like most Indian she doesn’t get that too much of anything is not good. I don’t want to tell you anything about the relationship between Devi and her mother, but it you defintely connect with the struggles of growing up Desi that she feels.

The show is really funny when it wants to too, most of the jokes land well. The writing is top notch and will definitely keep you hooked for the whole 10 episodes. It is also very quick and crisp with several great sub plots, and will be over before you know it. All the characters are given their own story lines and they land in most cases. Devi’s two best friends with seemingly one-note personality (the African-Latino robotic nerd and the east Asian drama queen) at first too get their own conflicts as the series conflicts as one of them realizes she’s gay and the other has mommy issues. The sub-plot concerning Devi’s cousin Kamala, also acts as a great commentary on the role of women in Indian households and the practice of arranged marriage.. Also some characters who are projected in the negative light in first half come around at the end and you realize why they are the way. Especialy Praxton, the guy Devi’s after, is probably the most human hot jock character in recent memory in a Netflix teen drama.

The only negative I have for this show is the overuse of voice-overs, which though funny at first, gets old very fast. Also the show has major problem with showing vs telling. Most of the big emotional plot points int story are told to you in a very short which makes it really hard to connect with. Like for example, in the last two episodes something which is meant to be this huge emotional tearjerker, but since it was developed well you just end up feeling a little shallow. But hey, if have a soft heart it will probably make you cry anyways.

Barring that one negative, this is really solid show. The episodes are well produced and tight and the star making performance from Maitreyi Ramakrishnan is a must watch (she is so likable and cute). The whole series is available to stream on Netflix right now, so just make some free time and watch this amazing show!

An Interview with Irish Alternative Rock Band Stone Sea

So, I would Like to preface this interview by saying that this my first time doing this, so I’m really excited and kinda nervous.

Nothing to be nervous mate, We are all new here and we’re excited to do this interview too.

Alright, thanks. I would just like to say that I love your work a lot and I’m really excited to see what you have in store for the future.

Okay, so let’s begin the interview.

`1. Would you guys please introduce yourselves and explain your role in the band?
Elvis Suhadolnik Bonesso – Lead Singer and Guitarist
Connor Middleton – Drums
Jonathan Parminter – Bass and Backing Vocals

2. Where did you guys meet and how did you form this band?
Well, Stone Sea originally started in Brazil around 2014, recording and releasing “Origins” in 2015, same year that Elvis traveled to Ireland where he reformed the band and recorded the EP’s “Vaporizer” (2017) and “Mankind Maze” (2019). The band had a line up change in 2019 and now counts with Jonathan in the bass and Connor in the drums.
Connor was the first to join the band, he had already seen a gig here in Dublin of which he really liked. When Elvis was doing some trials with new drummers, for his vision and his skills on the drums, he was chosen. Same with Jonathan actually but he just join the band around a month before the Irish tour releasing song by song of Mankind Maze.
Jonathan and Connor are now studying in the music college here in Dublin.

3. What kind of music do you make or would like to make in the future?
We are still experimenting some stuff. What we want to do is to bring more world music to our sound. We feel there’s a great connection between music from the root of civilizations and a crunchy and obese instrumentation.

4. What do you enjoy the most about the process of making music together?
The fact that we, individually, bring different ideas and influences. There’s always something interesting in blending styles and influences; it’s basically crafting newborn aliens.

5. What are some of your favorite themes to explore through your music?
Feelings and the subconscious mind. In other words things that cannot be described without ambiguity. I’d say is our way of exploring things we don’t understand, so we let them describe themselves in lyrics and wave forms.

6. Who are some artists that you love or who you’d say has had a huge influence on your work?
Black Sabbath and Nirvana had a huge influence in our work, but there are many more we could point out. Electric Wizard, Mr. Bungle, Megadeth, Slayer, Type O Negative, Pantera they all had their share on impacting our sound, somehow.

7. Where can someone looking for your music, find it?
Anywhere! We are on Spotify (Stone Sea), Youtube (/c/stonesea), Deezer, Bandcamp, Soundcloud. Not to mention our social platforms Facebook (/stoneseamusic) and Instagram (@stoneseaband).

8. What’s your favorite part about touring/ doing live performances?
Connection with life, people, places, cultures. Always refreshing to our minds to get to know new things. By discovering them we discover more about ourselves.

9. What kind of message would you like to give your fans, through your music?
That life isn’t made to be understood, but to be created.

10. Where do you guys see yourselves in the future, or what are you future plans for the band?
At the moment we are about to release a new music video for an alternative version of a song from “Mankind Maze”, we have a bunch of new tunes to be recorded, there’s also a UK tour planned for September but due to the Corona Virus situation it might be postponed, so keep an eye in our social media platforms!

“Sing to me, Muse”

Rising Sun in the rear mirror.
Brittle breeze sniffing on the red scarf
That she wraps around her neck
Hiding the tattoo she was given at birth.

The wretched river follows us right by the side
Of the road we’ve been ridin’ through all night
Through dark forests that smell of dead corpse
Filled with fireflies and nymphs playing harps.

She looks like she was brought down from heaven
Just for me,
She’s the one they call by the name ‘Raven’
She’s come to set me free.

She’s more beautiful than I can comprehend
Her eyes looking at me with reminiscence
Her face makes me wanna sing
In voices I can’t listen.

I don’t know where she’s leading me,
But I want to follow her
No matter how far
It’s not like I have a bigger purpose to serve.

She shines with a glistening glow
As the newborn sun kisses her face.
“Your life’s shorter than your shadow,
Ever wonder why you’re here, what’s your place?”

Born in the city of bones, I have never been bold
All my life I have done as I was told.
The thought of my place in this world never appeared
Or it did, and I taught myself to not think hard.

She turns her head and whispers, staring into my soul
“I know you have stories to tell, Sing them to me all”

I have always had a guitar
I want to play it to her
And even though I never learned to play it
I hit the strings, making up words to go with it.

“Sing to me, that’s all I ask of you
When the time comes, you will leave and forget all about me
But I want you to remember the songs you sing right now
Keep em’ and one day when you’re old, sing them in memory of me.”

“Sing to me of the man, Muse, the man of twists and turns
The man who sits on his throne, as the whole world burns”

A Kurt Cobain Appreciation post; on his 26th Death Anniversary

Kurt Cobain means a lot to me. Not just his music, but him as person. How does someone who’s been dead for longer than I’ve been alive, affect my life so much? I don’t know, but that’s the power Kurt had – he influenced and connected with an entire generation. Like Lars Ulrich of Metallica said “with Kurt Cobain you felt you were connecting to the real person, not to a perception of who he was — you were not connecting to an image or a manufactured cut-out. You felt that between you and him there was nothing — it was heart-to-heart. There are very few people who have that ability”

Now I don’t know what it must’ve felt like hearing the news of Kurt’s suicide on 5th April 1994 at the age of 27 (though the body was discovered three days later), but from what I’ve heard, it’s one the saddest days in rock history. I know this much, if I were alive back then I would probably lock myself in a room for the whole day and not talk to anyone. But that’s not what happened. In fact I only started to listen to nirvana’s music two years back. I had obviously heard of them and listened to smells like teen spirit, but other than that no real connection. But over the past two years they have grown to become one of my favorite bands of all time.

A portrait of the young man as an artist. For his eighth birthday in February 1975, Kurt received this easel from his paternal grandparents. Comic book characters were his favorite art subjects in childhood; he began with Disney-related fare, such as Donald Duck, but quickly moved to superheroes. Here, Kurt is copying the cover from Giant-Size Werewolf #4, an April 1975 Marvel comic.

Now this post isn’t about nirvana’s music or a review of their entire catalog, I just wanted to share with you my love Kurt Cobain and what he means to me. I feel a lot of personal connection with Kurt, things about his early life that reflect my own. Kurt had a tough childhood, a dysfunctional family and his parents divorced when he was small. He loved comic books and would sit in his class making drawings and sketches. He developed hatred for his father as he lived with him and later his mother, whose boyfriend abused her, which really left a emotional stain on Kurt. Kurt didn’t like sports but still pretended to be interested and played with others in school. He listened to classical and punk rock songs with passion since he was a kid. He also suffered from diseases like bronchitis from a very early age. He later fell prey to chronic diseases like depression in high school and also spent a period homeless. Now, these are not reasons to love someone, but somewhere, I feel Kurt would understand my life since it’s so much similar to his. But the most important thing is he survived through all those problems and lived fearlessly, which makes me look up to him even more.

Kurt Cobain of Nirvana during the taping of MTV Unplugged at Sony Studios in New York City, 11/18/93. Photo by Frank Micelotta.

But let’s be honest we wouldn’t be talking about Kurt today if it wasn’t for his music. Nirvana was a revolutionary act. Before them, alternative music was considered underground music, only for a niche. But Nirvana made Alternative music mainstream. And thanks to them Alternative music still remains one of the top genres in terms of quality and content. Nirvana became famous with their global hit single ‘smells like teen spirit’, from their 1991 album “Nevermind”. The album also earned great reviews for them and a tour deal for two years. And in no time they became the most adored rock stars of early 90’s. Their sound was revolutionary, inspired by artists like Iggy Pop and Pixies, it made wave for a new kind of music. Their music was raw, unfiltered and loud and it always left an impact on you. They had the ability to get to you.

An entry from Kurt’s journal.

But let’s talk about Kurt’s lyrics for a minute. I know he said they don’t mean anything and it’s useless to try and find any deeper meaning in them. He also said what’s most important to him while writing songs are melodies, and he writes lyrics just around them. Now I don’t know, I certainly don’t more about his own music than him, but his lyrics mean so much to me. They speak to me. According to his band mates he was even obsessed over writing lyrics and spent a long time during the process. He also would often rearrange and rewrite lines while recording them in studio. Also his journals reveal his love for writing and poetry. Trust me, if you ever get a chance, read his journals. And even when he was one of the biggest stars, self doubt hadn’t left him. He often writes about feeling worthless and about his depressive periods in his journals. I find Kurt’s lyrics very similar to Sylvia Plath’s poetry. They are both simple on the surface but possess really dark themes and deep meaning in them, if you listen carefully. And nowhere is this more apparent than in the band’s third and last studio album, “In Utero”, which contains some of Kurt’s most heartbreaking lyrics ever. What makes his lyrics so emotional is that there is no bridge between the words and the man. It is raw and exposes every part of Kurt out for display. He talks to you and you talk back to him, and the words stay with you forever.

Kurt’s suicide note.

Well, now I know that this story doesn’t have a happy ending. I know about his drug addiction, I know about the controversies, I know about his destructive relationship with Courtney Love, I know about his struggles with fame and the pain it caused him, and I know that he killed himself. But I don’t want to remember all that today, that’s just the shadow of the man I love, which he couldn’t avoid any longer. It had been hanging there with him for a long time and his time had come. No, I want to remember the man who defied the shadow, the man who brought light when the sun was gone. I want to remember the man who loved to drink strawberry milk. I want to remember the man who loved making sketches of Donald duck. I want to remember the man who spoke about the poor and damaged, the man who gave them a voice. I want to remember the man who was one of the first feminists and LGBT+ rights activists. I want to remember the beautiful man who sang like an angle, and tried to make a change. I want to remember the real Kurt Cobain.

The Lizard at The Edge of the World

Walking through the roads of oblivion,
The path leads me to gloom that’s stygian
Heard someone on the way say,
“Tis’ the edge of the world you’re movin’ towards”
But I dunno, all I can see is fucking sand everywhere.

My legs need rest but there’s no car to hitchhike
And my car broke down a long time back,
The sun’s blazing hot with full glory
The fucker’s trynna kill me, I know it.
Its heat’s melting flesh right off my bone.

I am a dead rat being chased by a hawk.
I got nothing to do now, no one to see, nowhere else to go
I will die alone in here
Torn and tired, snakes laying eggs inside my skull
Nobody to remember me, nobody to cremate my ashes,
Styx will carry me to hell completing my passage.

“So you’re gonna die just like that?”
Did someone say something? Who was that?
I look around me but don’t see anyone,
But I swear I heard someone speak in my tongue
I feel something on my hand and turned my gaze,
A tiny desert lizard sits there starin’ at my face.
“O lizard, was that you speaking?”
“Yeah why, never heard a lizard talking?”
The desert must’ve messed my mind, I’m hallucinating
There’s a fucking talking lizard, and I’m starin’ at it.

“You don’t need to say anything,
I know the thoughts you’re thinking,
Dying alone, is that what you wished for?”
” I don’t know what I wish, but first tell who you are?”
“I’m a concept inside your head, but for you that’s too absurd.
So here I am in the form of something you know and understand.”

Suddenly I’m reminded of the lonely nights I spent alone in a room,
The only connection I had to the living world is not one you’d assume.
A lizard lived on the walls of my room, even though it didn’t pay any rent.
Until now I hadn’t thought of him, I don’t even know where it went.

“But what do you want from me?” I ask the lizard.
“Man, I don’t need anything from you, I’m one with the river,
It’s my duty to guide wandering travelers to the next world,
Because it’s only a few, who reach to the end of this world.
I gave Oedipus his kingdom and married him to his mom,
I helped Odysseus complete his journey and return to his home.
But something’s wrong with you boy, you seem lost.
Your mind’s become cloudy, you’re haunted by your past.
You have become weak, you think you’ve committed a sin,
You want to meet Hades, as if he’ll cure your pain.”

The lizard’s words hit me straight,
I have become what I tried to escape.
“O lizard, I have made a terrible mistake,
What do I need to do now, to awake?”

“Be brave boy, that’s all you gotta do
Wait for the opportunity and it’ll come to you.
And though I have to go now, you’ll always find me here,
But you mustn’t come back here soon, you must lose your fear.”

“She’s coming to get you, come on, be quick.
Just remember it’s only the brave ones who make it.”
The lizard disappeared before my awakening,
In the distant horizon I see an old car approaching.

These Walls

There is a wall that separates us,
And yet brings us all close.
The only ones who survive inside
Are the ones who can take its brute force.


I’ve been stuck inside for a lil’ while now,
But I’ve already started to loose my mind
It’s like a never ending void of snow,
No way to get out, from all sides it’s confined.


Outside the walls, in the enchanted forest,
The bewitching sirens call out my name,
In their angelic voice that seduce even the purest,
The ones who can’t resist their temptations, go insane.


Stuck in this strange world, I dunno where else to go,
Roaming in this lonely land like a hungry wolf lookin’ for some dough,
But there ain’t no prey waiting for me,
Ain’t nobody missin’ me,
But I don’t mind it, it’s the fate I chose for me,
I convince myself I need no friends, I need no company,
I got me, and that’s plenty.


I’m not the only one in here, though
The place’s filled with travelers from all across the land,
But they speak in tongues I don’t know,
Faceless creatures of the night, walking in quicksand.


I wonder if they can see me,
Or am I just like em’, a wandering ghost?
Is this some kinda purgatory?
I wonder how many like me, does this place host?


Heard a voice inside me sayin’
“Isn’t this what you wanted?
A peace of mind,
Away the from all the things you called wicked.”


The place doesn’t bother me, it’s only the people who matter,
You only start valuing someone, once they go missin’.
As only the desert man values a drop of water,
For the seamen have plenty to drown themselves in.


These walls cannot drive us crazy,
These walls cannot institutionalize our thoughts the way they want,
These walls cannot make us weak and lazy,
And These walls sure can’t contain me, I’m too big for em’ to command.


Buckle up and all count your doors (Hey!)
I’m gonna open every one of em’, I’m sure (Hey!)
Don’t sit around (Hey!) and waste your time (Hey!)
waiting for your moment to come. (Heyyy!)
Buckle up all and leave your homes (Hey!)
I’m gonna roam till there’s no where else to go. (Hey!)
I’ll dance (Hey!) I’ll smoke (Hey!)
I’ll make you all let go (Heyyy!)
On this trip of life!